Holiness of Life by St. Bonaventure

[Stone]

CHAPTER IV: SILENCE

“In the multitude of words there shall not want sin” (Prov. x, 19.) I quote from the Book of Proverbs.

Obviously, a religious aiming to perfect his ways will find silence a very helpful virtue. To speak seldom, and then but briefly, prevents sin. Where there is too much talk, God is in one way or another offended, and reputations suffer. On the other hand, let only the virtue of silence come into its own, and people get their due. If we deal fairly with one another and practise the virtue of justice, we establish the bond of peace. This means that where silence is observed, the fruits of peace are gathered as easily as fruit is gathered from a heavily-laden tree.

Of all places in the world peace is essential in the cloister. Silence is of paramount importance in the life of a religious, because by means of silence peace of mind and body is preserved. Expounding on the virtue of silence, Isaiah the prophet said: “The work of justice shall be peace, and the service of justice shall be quietness” or silence (Is. xxxii, 17; Cf. S. Greg. Moral. VII, xvii, 58; S. Bern. Epis. lxxxix, 2.) It is as though he said: The nature of silence is such that it acts as a preservative of the godly virtue Justice. It encourages peaceful ways and enables men to live in peace and harmony.

We may lay it down as a principle that unless a man diligently “sets a guard to his tongue,” (Cf. Ps. xxxviii, 24. Ps. cxl, 3) he must lose all the graces he has acquired and necessarily and quickly fall into evil ways. “The tongue,” wrote the Apostle St. James, “is indeed a little member and boasteth great things.” It is “a fire, a world of iniquity” (James iii, 5, 6.) According to the commentators, St. James’ meaning is that almost all evil deeds are inspired or perpetrated by the tongue.

I shall now briefly enumerate for you, dear sister, the sins into which we are liable to fall if we do not keep a strict guard over the tongue. A loose and glib tongue easily becomes the vehicle of blasphemy and murmuring. The tongue that wags will be guilty of perjury, lying and detraction. The sin of flattery is easy to it. Easy as well are cursing, abusive language, quarrelsome talk, and words which mockingly slander virtue and entice to evil deeds. Scandalous gossip, vain boasting, the divulging of secrets, idle threats, rash promises, frequent and silly chattering and scurrilous conversation: all these sins come lightly, smoothly, and easily from an unguarded tongue.

To be unable to hold her tongue ought to make an ordinary woman blush. When the woman is a woman consecrated to God, a woman who knows the magnitude of the evils following on too easy a use of the tongue, then that woman’s life is marred by a gross blemish. I have no hesitation in saying that it is useless for a religious to take pride in the virtue which characterizes her, if by too much talking she observes the rule of silence only in the breach. “If any man think himself to be religious, not bridling his tongue but deceiving his own heart, this man’s religion is vain” (James i, 26.)

O amiable spouses of Jesus Christ, let us look up to Mary, Our Lady and Mother, since all virtues are reflected in Mary. Helped by the Holy Gospels, let us look upon her and learn how to keep silence. St. Luke records that Mary spoke seldom and with but few people. From him we learn that twice she spoke with the Angel (Luke i, 34 & 38), twice with her Divine Son (Luke ii, 48; John ii, 3), twice with her cousin St. Elisabeth (Luke i, 40 & 46 sq), and once to the waiters at the Marriage Feast (John ii, 5.) Thought on Our Lady’s spare use of words will do us good. It will cause us to blush. We are too talkative. With us it is talk, talk, talk, yet all the time silence is the great and useful thing.

Silence begets compunction of heart, and here is its first useful purpose. When a man is silent he falls to thinking and brooding over his manner of life (Cf. Ps. cxviii, 59.) This enables him quickly to see his many defects and the little progress he has made in the spiritual life, and soon compunction holds him captive. David tells us this: “I was mute and humbled, and kept silence from good things, and my sorrow was renewed” (Ps. xxxviii, 3.)

Silence has another advantage: It shows that man belongs to a better world. If a man lives in Germany and yet does not speak German, we naturally conclude that he is not a German. So too, we rightly conclude that a man who does not give himself up to worldly conversation is not of this world, although he lives therein. The argument is conclusive. St. John the Evangelist, quoting St. John the Baptist, has told us: “He that is of the earth, of the earth he is, and of the earth he speaketh” (John iii, 31. Cf. S. Bern. Epis. lxxviii, 4.)

The religious who wants to cultivate the habit of silence cannot do better than to shun the company of his fellows and lead the life of a solitary. When he has lifted himself out of himself, God should be his only companion and comforter. A solitary and quiet life should be his aim. To have God as his companion should suffice, and he should look for neither comfort from nor companionship with men. “He shall sit solitary,” avoiding the companionship of his fellows, “and shall hold his peace,” (Lamentations, iii, 28) and meditating on heavenly things, he should lift himself above himself and revel in the sweetness of heavenly delights.

To be perfectly virtuous, a religious must practise silence. Silence is essential to the spouses of Jesus Christ and to women consecrated to God. Religious women should be particularly sparing with their words. Their words should be “precious” (Cf. I Kings iii, I.) Talking should cause them to blush, and they should never speak except in extreme necessity. St. Jerome may be quoted very aptly here: “Let the words of a virgin be few and seemly, and precious rather by their reticence than by their eloquence” (S. Jer., Epis. i, 19.)

One of the great philosophers of old taught in the same way: “To be perfect, I would counsel you to speak but little and only on rare occasions. When a rare occasion occurs, remember too, to speak scarcely above a whisper” (Seneca, Ep. xl.) O you talkative girls, you chatterboxes, you garrulous nuns! I have a story for you which, if you take it to heart, will teach you what you must do if you would learn to keep silence.

In the lives of the Fathers (Migne Patr. V, Book iv, 7), it is related that a certain abbot, Agathon by name, kept a stone in his mouth to prevent his talking. For three years he continued the practice until at last he learned how to hold his tongue. Take this lesson to heart: tie a stone to your tongue. Fasten your tongue to your palate. “Put thy fingers on thy mouth” (Judges xviii, 19) and learn to keep silent. Remember always that it ill becomes a woman vowed to Christ to look for conversation with any one except her Spouse Jesus Christ.

Talk, therefore, only on rare occasions, and let your conversations be short. Use but few words. Speak in fear and trembling and in all modesty. Above all “scarcely ever speak in your own cause,” (Cf. Ecclesiasticus xxxii, 10), that is, in your own defence. Cover your face with a veil of bashful modesty. Sew your lips together with the threads of rule and discipline. Let your words be few, for “in the multiplicity of words there shall not want sin” (Prov. x, 19.) Let your conversation be useful, modest and humble. Never speak an idle word, because “every idle word that men shall speak, they shall render an account for it in the day of judgment” (Matt, xii, 36.) Speaking of idle words, it may be noticed with St. Gregory that “an idle word is one that the speaker uses without necessity or with no advantage to the hearer” (S. Greg., Moral., VII, xvii, 58.)

It is always better and more useful to be silent than to speak. As witness of which truth let me quote a saying of Xenocrates, one of the philosophers of old: “I have often repented because I spoke, but never have I been sorry that I held my peace.” (Val. Max. vii Dict. Fact. Memorab., 2.)