03-14-2021, 02:30 PM
“The family is more sacred than the state, and men are begotten not for the earth and for time, but for heaven and eternity.”
Pope Pius XI, Casti Connubi
CHAPTER EIGHT :
Modesty, Is for Men Also
We all are aware that men can be immodest and can be fooled into certain fashions of the day that are also improper. Many men, also think that modesty is primarily for women and it is true that women’s modesty is the key to bringing the world back to its senses. But modesty for men is closely tied with their masculinity. Men have grown up for the past few decades also damaged by our highly sexualized environment. More than women, they are affected by this sometimes unknowingly. Women who practice unisex dressing and immodest dress have slowly forced their way into a man’s world and men, being courteous have let them in to the detriment of their manhood! Women dress immodestly for many reasons, but primarily for attention in one way or another. Men are on the receiving end of the selfish vanity of women and they pay a high price. Having a greater inborn drive, they often are led into committing sinful acts. Woe to those women who are the cause of their frustration!
A woman’s immodesty not only insults men but steals from them a valuable virtue that is very much connected to their being a man, their honour. Their honour makes them feel a healthy obligation to help a woman carrying a heavy load, for example. The simple visual image of a woman in a dress carrying something heavy will make any man feel the need to offer her help.
This is why modesty in dress is so important for the restoration of sanity in our society. Something as simply as opening a door for a woman was done because men respected women. Men’s honour led them to help women whenever possible. Women, of course, being truly feminine and humble allowed them and were grateful for their offer of help.
Some men are insulted by having to view impurity at every turn. Remember, it is mostly women who are portrayed in an advertisement to sell everything and anything. These immodest or scantily clad women are present in billboards, movies, bus stop ads, magazines, newspapers and catalogues! Even modest women are disgusted by them, but at least we are not attracted to them and having to pull ourselves away! Women and men should do all they can to show how much they disapprove of such displays. Refuse to purchase from stores who use these forms of ads to sell items and tell them why you are no longer their customer! Return magazine subscriptions with your reason and demand a refund! Write to newspaper editors when their papers display such ads, which they almost always do! Even the supposed ‘news’ is filled with stories of infidelities and other filth! Stop going to improper movies and throw away all those clothing catalogues filled with immodest displays of fashion! Is it any wonder that the statistics for sex crimes in general has increased significantly in the last 30 years? Be brave, be a ‘martyr of purity’ and defend it at all times!
But we must realize that men have grown up in a culture that idolizes scantily clad women. Many a man, unfortunately, has never known a modest, or feminine woman. Perhaps, not even their own mother practised modesty! These same men therefore, may scoff at the idea of their wives wearing long dresses all of the time! Some may even complain to their wives! Although a husband may try to discourage his wife, if she should persevere with prayer, she will see the fruits of her sacrifice. Many a secular minded man has come to realize the beauty of a true woman, for the first time perhaps, when his wife persevered in her modest dressing. I want to encourage a wife in this situation and remind her to have compassion for her husband who has had the truth hidden from him by society. ‘With prayer nothing is impossible’. If we truly love our husbands as we should, we will patiently pray for God to convert their hearts to the beauty of modesty. Just as it takes time to appreciate classical music when one has been brought up on ‘junk-rock’ music, it may take time for the appetite, so to speak, to adjust to the natural beauty of a true woman, after the artificial beauty of today’s women. So do not allow yourself to become discouraged!
Catholic men, especially those who are single, would do well to understand just what a modest woman is. They would do well to read the previous chapters in this book too. This will help them in the wise selection of a wife who will lift up their souls. Proverbs 31:10 tell us, “How hard it is to find a capable wife! She is worth far more than jewels!” The choice of a modesty wife will go a long way to securing for you this jewel who will accompany you through life. It may mean the difference between happiness and suffering!
Other chapters here include useful information for men as well concerning ‘custody of the eyes’ and ears and so forth. I do hope that they will be read by any man concerned for his own salvation, and in the preservation of the masculinity of true men in society.
As mentioned previously, “Man himself does not escape from the inclination of exhibiting his flesh: some go in public stripped to the waist, or in very tight pants or in very scanty bathing suits. They thus commit offences against the virtue of modesty. They may also be an occasion of sin (in thought or desire) for our neighbor.”
Guidelines for Honorable Men…
In keeping with the above Bishop’s statements for men would include the following.
1. Loose fitting, long pants. Long sleeves and pants are the old rule for men in Church and should be adopted again. Immodest swimwear is most unbecoming and this should be guarded against.
2. Never is it proper for a man to be without a shirt in public. This also excludes all tight clothing for men.
Men also can play a part in helping women to regain their modesty. Bishop Williamson has seven practical suggestions for men that we have adapted for you here:
1. First, men obey God and submit to His law and give the example to your womenfolk who will find it much easier to obey you when they see you are under the law yourselves. Kneel down, in front, (I add, daily) and recite the family Rosary.
2. Throw out, without mercy, that television set as being the primes poisoner of your mind and the minds of those around you. Waste little time on newspapers (or magazines). The media are vile. (If your TV is kept, use it only for the watching of Catholic videos or documentaries that are available today. Disconnect your cable or antennae so no stations are received. Ed.)
3. Stop wallowing in Hollywood slush and video mush, which are mostly pornographic and will bring out the beast in you. Romantic movies will weaken your manliness by exalting your feeling over your sense of reason. No amount of “macho” sports will make you a man when your entertainments make you either a beast or a woman.
4. Give your womenfolk all the affection that they need, even a bit more, (love us as Christ commanded?) but do not wrap yourselves around them. The bean plant wraps around the pole and not the pole around the plant!
5. Yourselves abstain from, and discourage your womenfolk’s participation in any activity that necessitates immodest dress on their part, such as, athletic competitions, especially when these place women in graceless competition with each other. Fighting may build manliness, but it destroys womanliness. (I witnessed this myself on a documentary that had women body builders in competition. They looked physically more like men that some men do! What is this world coming to! Ed.)
6. Do not abstain from manly activities yourself, but do not have your women accompanying you in trousers. Instead attend activities where they can accompany you modestly dressed. Remember that they need your company too.
7. Never admire women when they are unfeminine or immodest but readily admire them when they are feminine and modest. 9B.
I hope all men will embrace modesty for themselves, their wives or wives to be, their children and society at large. Many wives will have purchased this book and shared it with their husbands. But there are those few men who will have purchased it and I encourage you to share it with all those women whom you know and love so that they too may be converted from the pagan fashions of this day!